Something I Miss, Plus an Apology

"...Day 12, Sunday: What do you miss? (a person, a thing, a place, a time of your life...)..."
*I missed posting this yesterday. I'm sick and yesterday I felt absolutely terrible.*

If I had to say I miss one thing, I think it would have to be how skinny I used to be. As vain as that sounds, it's completely true. I miss not having stretch marks every where I look. I hate that I can't wear a bikini this summer without feeling self conscious. I don't fit in about 98% of my clothes. I miss the confidence I used to have in myself. 

Right before I got pregnant with Aiden, I definitely wasn't the smallest I've ever been, but if I could just get back to that point I would be extremely ecstatic. I used to tell myself that the number on the scale doesn't matter, that as long as I'm fit and toned that is all that matters. That isn't completely true. The scale completely destroys me. It's discouraging and my husband always threatens to hide the batteries. I think I would die. It's become a habit for me to weigh myself three times a day. My weight flucuates constantly and sometimes it gets really high, but when it gets really low, it's an instant boost of confidence. And confidence is definitely what I need to stay motivated on my weight loss journey. It's tough, but I take it one day at a time and I'm always one day closer to my goal.

"...Day 13, Monday: Issue a public apology. This can be as funny or as serious or as creative as you want it to be..."

I could apologize for a lot of things; I'm sure of that. But this apology is for my Instagram followers and Facebook friends:

I'm sorry that 90% of what I post on Insta and Facebook has to do with Aiden. He is everything I have ever wanted. I've prayed for such a long time for an angel like him. My whole life revolves around him and he makes me the happiest, most proud momma in the entire world. He shows me the deepest love and he brings so much light to my life. 

I think social media sites such as Instagram and Facebook are meant for us to share recent, relevant times of our lives. We all have things that makes us proud and happy. Some people choose to rant. Some people choose to share their drunken state with the public. I choose to share Aiden with all of you. 

Sorry I'm not sorry.

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